Paper
How plants (and quite a few other things) came to be
2nd Draft of a Folk Tale
by
Jared Kling
Narrator: The story I’m about to tell might not be true. Or maybe it is. Judge for yourself.
Long ago, when Mother Earth was still young, beasts roamed the earth and no plants grew. A dog eat dog world. A cruel world. Man was just walking upright. IT was in charge. IT was a giant monster. Green all over with six claws on each paw, giant dagger teeth. A monster of monsters. A beast of beasts.
Narrator: It is important that you remember IT was green.
But (as could be expected on such a world) all was not well. IT was eating the animals one by one. Soon, only man and a few of each animal was left. They all got together, talked it over (for animals could talk back then), and decided they must get rid of IT. To do this they decided to drive IT into a large cave by Fire Mountain ( in a place we now call Africa) and put boulders over the entrance.
Narrator: Did you forget that IT was green?
A chance came for Man and the animals to carry out their plan. IT chased two birds into the cave, the birds left through a secret exit, and animals waiting outside push boulders over the entrance. IT was trapped. Forever.
Narrator: But back to the trees.
IT tried to get out. Made such a mess all the continents started moving to where they are today. IT needed to find a way out. IT pushed it’s arms so hard on the walls of the cave trying to get out IT’s arms broke through. Then IT got stuck. IT couldn’t pull IT’s arms in, or push them out. So IT did the only thing it could. IT started sucking energy out of the sun (what else silly?). Not a lot. No one could notice, but IT just started sucking.
IT’s arms became plants. It was green, and that’s why plants are green. IT went to sleep and everyone forgot about IT. But now and then, IT wakes up, and when IT does, WATCH OUT!! That’s how earthquakes, and volcanoes, and a lot of other things come from.
Narrator: Well. Did you believe that? You didn’t?!? Well of course I think it’s true. Sure scientists give you their “scientific” reasons, but now you and I know the REAL truth.
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